Friday, May 22, 2015

65 Days and 65 Years

65 days left 'til Ironman Lake Placid.

My dad would be 65 years old if he was alive today.

It has been 17 years since he has been gone but I still get those "punched in the gut" moments when I miss him and it is always at the most awkward times.

Like at the office.

We have 5 years left until our mortgage is paid off and now when I look at it, it is no different than the amount of a car loan.  So I have questions.  Oh, so many questions.

Like what if I wanted to shop for a new loan with a way cheaper mortgage rate?  Where do I start? What kind of loan is it?  Home Equity?  Personal loan?  Does it have to be refinance type deal?

My head goes on and on until I realize that what I really need to do is call my bank.  But I don't want to call a stranger at an institution because really, the bottom line is, I want to call my dad.

17 years later, and I still want to ask him money questions.

The amazing man with all the answers. He knew all the finance tricks and tips.  He knew loans. He was so frugal.  Who knew how to save for retirement.  And this would be the year he would finally get to retire.

65 years.

Yeah. Punched in the gut.

But you can't dwell on the sadness very long.  I am at work so I have to keep it together.  You just swallow that lump and keep going.  You research.  You remember all those smart friends in your life that you admire and respect on how they handle money and you reach out.

Back in September 2001, 6 days after September 11th, I was driving home from being stranded from the airport.  I rear ended someone making a left turn on a two-way country road.  I totaled my cute little 1994 Honda Civic royal blue hatchback.

So now it is time to go car shopping but this time there is no Dad by my side.

Sucker punch in the gut.

Again.  Swallow the lump.

I need to drive to pay those bills.

So I bought a book on how to buy a car.  I looked up the Blue Book values and researched all the add-ons.  Armed with all my information,  I went to three dealerships.  Told them point blank that I was buying from the dealer that gave me the best price.

And I did.

Bought a 2002 Honda CRV Ex in deep forest green.  I will never forget that moment I picked it up.

I did it and I am still driving it today.  My CRV is 13 years old this year.

On a lighter note, I had a good run tonight.

Whew.  Finally.

It has been so raining so much lately that our livable forest is as humid as a tropical rainforest.  Breathing in this soup is tough.  I had my dear Ironman Texas friend run with me tonight.  He entertained me with a full race report so the miles flew by.  I sure needed that boost since my confidence in my run has been down lately.

Gearing up for a 3-day weekend and then I am off to Miami.  Time is ticking by.

65 days to train and 65 days to raise enough funds to reach my fundraising goal.  If you are able to help fund the research to beat the cancer that took my dad's life, please donate HERE.

I have my moments in training and in fundraising that I don't know how it is all going to work out.  I start to get scared and doubt myself.  

But then I remember that I just have to swallow that lump and push forward.